Like A Fool
by Sigrid Martell
Summary: "Release me", I said, my voice hard. He tightened his hold on my wrist and pulled me against him, my back to his chest, his other arm going around my waist. "Elia", he whispered in to my ear, "Please". Elia x Rhaegar fluff! :D Pen Name changed from Kia'a Morris to Sigrid Martell And Title changed from 'Elia' to 'Like A Fool'.
1. Like A Fool

**A/N:** _**I would like to thank 'Failed to De-anon', my cool and awesome beta, for proof reading my one-shot for any grammar mistakes. She is totally the BEST! Her stories for Elia Martell are AMAZING! She's the reason why I am so in love with Elia Martell Targaryen, so please check her stories out!**_

 _ **Anyway, This one-shot plot takes place after Harrenhal. I needed to add Elia Martell into the GoT archive cause Lyanna Stark and Rhaegar Targaryen was in it and so it kind of pissed me off to the point where I decided to write. And thus, this story was born. Although there are many theories involving this plot, this is my own. Elia's name deserves to be in the archive. She's the most bravest and the most interesting character besides Sansa and Myrcella, that I love in the whole wide world. So Please, ENJOY!  
**_

 **Disclaimer:** I do _**NOT**_ own A Song of Ice and Fire, if I did, Elia and her children wouldn't have met a cruel end.

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000

Aegon's cries could be heard throughout the whole castle.

He was hungry.

Tired and sleepy, I stood up from my comfortable bed and attended to him straight away. Picking up my baby boy from his basinet, I peeked through the window to see that it was still night out though I could hear the birds in the trees singing and chirping, signaling that the sun would soon come out to play. I carried Aegon and sat down on the wooden rocking chair that my brother, Prince Doran, sent as a gift.

"Shhhhh, mother is here, my little prince", I whispered, gently settling him against my chest. I unlaced the ribbons from the front of my dress that held my bosom and lifted my left breast to Aegon's small mouth. He fussed a bit and as if he smelt the milk, his little mouth latched on to the nipple of my breast and suckled greedily.

I sighed and let my son feed in peace, with the chair rocking gently.

Thoughts from what had happened a month ago, Rhaegar winning the tourney and the events following his victory, came rushing back in.

 _ **Flashback:**_

 _He strode past me, not once looking my way, towards the Stark she-wolf and laid the blue winter roses on her lap, crowning her_ _ **his**_ _Queen of Love and Beauty. Whispers erupted amongst the crowd, floating in the air._

" _I'm going to fucking kill him!" my brother, Oberyn, whispered in rage next to me. To stop him from doing something rash and foolish, I placed my hand against his lap and whispered to him, "Don't"._

 _He looked angry at first then he softened his gaze when he saw that I was stoic and unmoved by the whole ordeal. I am a princess after all and_ _ **wife**_ _to the heir of the Kingdom, I must act as such._

 _My heart sank when I saw the young girl blush, her eyes on the beautiful roses. She then looked at Rhaegar. A huge blanket of silence fell upon the crowd as the prince,_ _ **my husband**_ _, smiled at the young Stark girl. It remained like that for a small moment._

 _Then Aegon started to cry, disturbing everyone; including myself from the weary silence the show caused._

 _The whole crowd's eyes fell heavily upon me and Aegon._

 _Rhaegar caught my gaze, his indigo eyes dark. Not showing any emotion upon my face other than worry for my son, I looked away from Rhaegar and got up from my seat, settled Aegon properly against my chest, whispered to Oberyn to remain behind and headed down the steps and out of the arena, with my ladies following me._

 _I ignored the looks of pity on everyone's faces; their eyes staring after me and my son_.

" _Shhhh, my son", I whispered, "I am here"._

 _ **End of Flashback.**_

Though I didn't show it to anyone, not even to my closest friend, Ashara, I can still remember the anger I felt that day. Of course I was upset, what wife wouldn't? But most of all, I was hurt. Deeply hurt. I had thought that he felt the same way for me as I do for him.

I was wrong.

He wasn't in love with me. He was in love with another.

Lyanna Stark.

The whole Seven Kingdoms are now bustling with the news and stories of what had happened that day. I can't even walk in peace without people whispering behind my back or glancing at me with pity through their beady little eyes.

 _I think I_ _ **hate**_ _you Rhaegar. I wish I did. I really wish I could hate you but I can't. There is a little traitor here beneath my breast that refuses to let go of the love I have for you._

The sting of hurt started to fill my heavy heart once more as I think back to what Maester Pycelle said to me, the day Aegon was born. He told me that I couldn't have any more babies, for if I were to become pregnant again, I would surely die. No doubt he must have told my husband about it.

It is probably why he is doing this. To get a third head for his dragon, he needs another woman to bear him one more child to fulfill his twisted prophesies. I suppose that's what he meant when he told me on the day of Aegon's birth.

" _ **A great dragon needs a third head".**_

That was also the day I kissed Rhaegar.

I felt a warm air caress my breast and looked down to see that Aegon had finished feeding and was now asleep. I got up, slowly, to not wake him and placed him back in his cot. As I was gently tucking him in, a soft knock sounded against the door.

I looked up to see that it was the prince himself who has ruthlessly taken my heart, my husband. After weeks of absence, he is finally here to grace me with his presence.

 _How wonderful,_ I thought sarcastically.

As he shut the door softly behind him, He looked at me.

"Elia", he breathed, as if he's relieved to finally say my name.

I curtsied and murmured a, "My prince, what do I owe the pleasure of you visiting me in this hour? Have you come to see the children?"

He didn't say anything, just nodded.

I forced a smile and stepped aside from the cot so that he could see Aegon. He walked towards the cot and looked in. A look of love appeared on his face. He caressed Aegon's head gently and kissed his rounded cheek.

My heart swelled with affection from the scene before me. _This heart of mine will be the death of me,_ I thought as I wrung my hands together. I went to move away as I was standing too close to Rhaegar for comfort, but, felt a large hand grip my small wrist, stopping my movements.

"Elia."

My eyes widened at him saying my name, it sounded so...sad. I didn't look at him for I was afraid to see what might linger in those dark eyes of his. _I was a Princess of Dorne. A Princess that walked among vipers, I shouldn't be afraid._ I tugged on my hand.

"Release me", I said, my voice hard.

He tightened his hold on my wrist and pulled me against him, my back to his chest, his other arm going around my waist.

"Elia", he whispered in to my ear, "Please".

Though we were still dressed; he in his tunic and I in my night shift, I could feel the heat on his chest warming my cold back. I felt my heart start to beat furiously against its cage, demanding to be free from its confines. He brushed his nose against the arch of my neck and breathed in my scent, he then brushed his nose against my hair. I blushed.

"Elia", he breathed in to my ear, "Please look at me".

I didn't move nor say anything. How could I when there is fury within my heart that might compel me to do something I would later regret?

"Please Elia", he said it so softly, his voice sounding so needy that it made me release a shaky breath as he relinquished the hold he had on my wrist. My body stiffened when I felt his hand start to caress my shoulder, slowly trailing down my smooth arm; his pale, white flesh clashing against my golden-brown skin. He, then, brought his hand to my throat and lightly placed a small kiss on my temple. _Why is he doing this to me? Why cannot I move from this hold that he has over me?_

His arm around my waist loosened as he slowly turned me around. He kissed my nose, my jaw, and then on the bow of my lips. His kisses were hot and sweet, not like the one we shared last time. Our eyes were locked on each other as his lips graze mines. His eyes had fire in them, the indigo color burned brightly.

 _He is so…beautiful,_ I thought before he suddenly claimed my lips in a hot searing kiss, his arms holding my body flushed against his. I let him kiss me. I welcomed his tongue in to my mouth when he sought for entrance. I allowed my body to feel the stirrings he caused.

 _Oh, by the seven gods, I love him._

Memories of the tourney came rushing as I closed my eyes to kiss Rhaegar back.

 ** _Lyanna Stark._**

Fury started to boil in my blood. I was angry at Rhaegar. And at myself for giving in too easily to his desires. I wrenched myself away from his embrace and away from him, putting as much distance between us as I could. He was breathing heavily. His eyes watched me intently. To calm myself, I took a few breaths, blowing some of the waist length brown dark locks framing my oval face away. When I could bring myself to look at him once more, I found myself staring at one of his hands, it was holding an all too familiar purple ribbon. _He must have untied it from my hair while we were..._

I frowned at him.

Careful not to wake Aegon up, in a low voice, I seethed, "How dare you?! How dare you think you can just come in here and take your husband rights with me after what you did to me at Harrenhal?! You pass by me, _me,_ _ **your wife**_ ", I pointed to his chest, "And you crown a _girl_ who is years younger than you", I continued without blinking. I noticed he was slowly walking towards me but I didn't move. "Without any regard of how I or it would look?"

My eyes slid to the floor as my hands clasped together against my chest. "Or how _I would_ _feel?"_ I whispered, tears trickling down my cheeks. _Please stop crying,_ I begged inside of my head.

 _Please._

Rhaegar stood in front of me, his hand wrapping around my fists and the other tilting my chin upwards, his indigo orbs locking onto my yellow ones.

"I have wronged you", he said as he kissed my wet cheeks.

"Not only have you wronged me, you made me look like a fool in front of all the lords and ladies of the realm", I said sadly, turning my yellow orbs away from him.

He gripped my chin, though not too hard to bruise and forced me to look at him. "There are no words to describe how sorry I am for hurting you," he said, his voice low. "It was not my intention to hurt you, Elia, but you must understand, _**The Dragon has three heads, there must be one more**_ ".

His words struck me hard, making my heart constrict in pain _. No matter_ _how much I wanted it, a third head is the one thing that I cannot give him._

"Then it's a good thing that you have found someone younger and suitable to help you with that", I said angrily as I tried to pull away from him, but his arm went around my waist and held me tightly against him.

"Elia", he said. "Stop this, please".

"No, relea—" I didn't get to finish my words when suddenly; Rhaegar's lips were upon mines, hard and demanding. My anger flared up at him for interrupting me.

I wanted to hurt him. I wanted to slap him for touching me. To scream at him to release me but as Rhaegar moved me towards the bed; he whispered words of how much he misses me, of how much he _needed_ me.

And like a fool, I allowed myself to give in to the desires that were locked away in my heart.

 _ **The End.**_

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 **A/N: _Love it? Hate it? Please let me know by reviewing this baby and thank you so much for reading! I will be putting up a sequel to this bad boy soon once it's complete. So stay tuned! ;)_**


	2. If You Love Me (Why'd You Leave Me?)

Hi Everyone :)

I am so sorry for not updating like I promised but like every writer out there, life and mainly school got in the way of my story updating. And I have to admit, with so much going on in my life, I felt really low on motivation for this story. But, the other day I was listening to Ellie Goulding's - All I Want song and inspiration shook my very being that it entranced me to finish this piece.

The song was so emotional and mesmerising that it convinced me not to give up on this story. So I recommend all readers to download and listen to this song while reading this chapter. I promise you, you won't regret it.

I also want to thank 'Failed To De-anon' for proof reading this angsty story. She is an amazing writer of Elia Martell. Check out her stories if you haven't already.

0000

I was sitting in my husband's solar; it has been unused by him for many moons now. Rhaenys, my sweet three year old daughter, was sitting next to Viserys, drawing.

Aegon, my adorable baby boy, was lying in his bassinet, sucking on his small fist while making soft gurgling sounds.

My ladies were sitting around me, sewing and lightly chatting to each other.

Ashara Dayne, my closest and dearest friend, was sitting beside me. Her face was the most familiar and friendly amongst the strangers who have surrounded me. She, too, was sewing though she refused to speak with the other ladies besides me, muttering how they were all a bunch of ninnies.

I softly laughed at that.

Though she seemed rather engrossed in her work, I knew her focus wasn't on the stitching she had in her hands.

No, it was on Brandon Stark.

The man came barreling into King's Landing; angry and foolish, demanding for Rhaegar to come out and die. Apparently, from the gossip and confirmation from my ladies, Rhaegar, my husband, 'kidnapped' the Stark girl and has altogether disappeared. The last time I saw my husband was the night we were... _together._

That was three weeks before the wild wolf's unexpected visit.

Five moons later, Brandon Stark is still sitting in the black cells, awaiting his punishment for threatening the heir of the Iron Throne.

 _Poor man._

 _I wonder what my good-father, the Mad King, has planned for the unfortunate Stark,_ I mused sadly.

 _My husband is a fool_.

Now, because of his selfish actions, the Stark family will lose their eldest son and Ashara, her lover.

I set my stitching aside and laid my hands on my large stomach. It had been unexpected when I found out I was with child.

Maester Pycelle, who declared me unfit to have any more children, confirmed it with me and suggested that I take a special 'concoction' to rid me of my child. He told me to consider what happened in the last pregnancy, when I almost died giving birth to Aegon.

I was appalled by his mere suggestion. I told him that even if it kills me, I will not end the life of an innocent child, _my child_.

The old man tried to make me reconsider; but, I stood firm. _This unborn baby of mines will live._ If I have to pay the price with my life to make it so, then it shall be done.

When news of my pregnancy reached the Queen; who was also pregnant, she immediately sent a letter to Maester Aemon, requesting his assistance and guidance for my unborn child. The queen did not want Maester Pycelle anywhere near me or the child when I told her of his 'concoction' despite his claim of the best intentions. Maester Aemon came as soon as the letter reached him and has been by my side ever since.

The man was very strict and watchful of my health, despite him being blind and very old. He has me, to my dismay, eating red meat, in every meal as well as some fruits and vegetables on some occasions, saying I needed to gain some weight.

After four moons, gone was the thinness of my arms and thighs. Though I still looked frail, my body seemed to have a healthy glow to it.

Having Maester Aemon here with me was a grand idea. It made me feel safe and unworried.

Maybe this time, things will be different.

 _Maybe_ , if the gods are merciful, I will live long enough to see my unborn child's first name day.

The sound of metal clanging and footsteps heading this way, caused everyone; including me, to look up.

Rhaegar.

He was walking towards us with two Kingsgaurd flanking him: Ser Arthur Dayne and Ser Lewyn Martell, my uncle. Rhaenys' little form shot up, "Papa!"

She squealed as she ran into his arms. Rhaegar smiled as he lifted the little girl up and swung her in the air, causing her to giggle. He hugged her when Rhaenys said that she missed him. Saying he missed her too, he gave her a kiss on the forehead. When Rhaegar moved his searching, dark eyes along my ladies, it fell quiet.

His eyes betrayed no emotion when his indigo orbs met my yellow ones. When they landed on my big stomach, something flickered in his eyes.

 ** _It was anger._** _He's angry?_ Why would he be angry?? **_I_** should be the one angry **_not_** him.

He looked cold and disappointed, his chest was heaving as he was breathing hard.

"So, it's true" he said, not caring that there were people, besides us both, in the solar.

"Is what true?" I asked, pretending to be confused.

"You being with child" he replied, putting a smiling Rhaenys down. I noticed he still held on to our daughter's small hand.

With my face devoid of any emotion, I said a single word: "Yes".

His dark eyes hardened, "Leave us".

At first, everyone remained quiet and afraid. The two Kingsgaurd stood rigid and unmoved.

" **Now** ", he commanded, not moving his eyes away from mine.

Ashara sneaked a look at me and I nodded for her to listen. My ladies quickly got up and took the children outside. Ser Arthur Dayne followed behind Ashara. My Uncle, Ser Lewyn, who still had yet to move, looked concernedly between me and Rhaegar.

I smiled reassuringly at him and nodded for him to follow the others.

When we were left alone, Rhaegar approached me, his steps slow. I kept my gaze on his; not wanting to lose to whatever game he was playing at.

"Why have I not heard of this sooner??" He growled.

I frowned at him. "I had thought you wouldn't care, considering your infatuation with the wolf girl".

"Of course I care Elia. How could you think that???!" He roared, making me flinch. It made me angrier, as well; but, before I could respond, Rhaegar continued. "I had the right to know Elia!! I'm the father of the child, am I not!?"

My eyes hardened at the clear indication and I slowly stood up from my chair; the weight of my stomach slowing my movements. Rhaegar saw this and moved to help me up but I held my hand up to stop him.

"Of course you are! How could you say otherwise?! This baby is as much as yours as it is mine!" I yelled, heat rising up to my cheeks. "The only man that has ever graced my bed was you and only you. I have never sought paramours nor have I ever betrayed our vows, not like you with the Stark girl!"

Too angry to look at him any more, I turned away from him and leaned against the window of the solar. I repeated the words of my house in my head; _Unbent, Unbowed_ and _Unbroken_ and took deep breaths to calm myself down.

A pair of strong arms wrapped around me and sighed, "I apologize. I had not meant for you to be angry. I was just upset that you didn't send news of you being with child to me sooner".

"Oh? And pray tell where would I send the raven to if no one knew where you were? Lest I remind you, **_Husband_** , you and the girl disappeared without a trace or a word of goodbye, leaving me and our children so you could go play prophesies with **_her_** ", I seethed, trying to move away from his embrace.

He kept his arms around me and whispered. "Words of apology cannot make up for what I d—".

"Please spare me your false words of sympathy, Rhaegar", I scoffed. "I grow tired of it".

"Eli—".

"What did you and the girl do during the time you were away?" I asked, interrupting him, my gaze still on the horizon.

My question was answered with silence. I felt my heart start to ache in pain as a tear rolled down my cheek. He gently turned me around and wiped it away. "Please understand Elia. It had to be done. I needed a third h—"

"Is she with child?" I interrupted, staring into his eyes.

Sadness and shame graced his beautiful face, the wind gently blowing his silver hair about. "Yes".

 _Oh_.

"How wonderful it must be for you. Not only will you get a third head, you will get a fourth one as well." I replied sarcastically.

He grimaced. "Elia, I'm so—"

"Did you meet with your father?" I asked sharply, as I turned away from him to once again lean against the window. I rested my hands on the window sill.

He hesitated. "Yes. He didn't take it too well when I plead mercy for Brandon Stark, but he agreed to let him go on the condition that the Stark heir be returned to Winterfell and never set foot in King's Landing unless summoned by him".

Closing my eyes, I released a shaky breath I didn't realize I was holding. Ashara will be pleased with this news. I felt Rhaegar's hands upon my shoulders. "D-Do you love her?"

The room fell silent as soon as the words left my lips. I frowned and turned towards him. I stared at him, "Rhaegar?"

He turned his back to me, "I would be lying to you if I said I didn't feel anything but fondness for her………."

My heart felt like it was drowning in the deepest and darkest depths of the ocean as the walls built around my love began to crumble. Struggling to breathe, I leaned back against the window and tried to calm my erratic breathing.

 _He. Loves. Her._

 _Not me._

 ** _Her._**

Feeling a little light-headed, I gracefully walked to the chair and, with some difficulty, slowly lowered myself down on it. Closing my eyes, I rested my hand on my stomach and the other to my temple, to gently rub the slight ache away.

"But that does not mean I don't feel the same way about you. **I love you, Elia** ", he says, his tone meaning it. I felt a painful sting against my chest when he said those words.

 ** _I love you._**

Oh how I wanted those words to be true whenever I hear them from his mouth.

Now. **_Now_** they seem meaningless.

Nothing but empty words.

Empty promises.

When was the last time that that those words felt real? A tear slipped from under my lashes.

 _I truly can't remember._

I didn't hear him move nor did I feel the shift in the air but my hands were removed from their places and into warmer ones.

In to his hands. **_The hands of the Dragon._**

I opened my eyes to see him bent down in front of me. His beautiful indigo eyes raging with passion and certainty. "There are many things that I know I shouldn't have done", he said, his voice raw with guilt.

With his eyes still on mines, he entwined our hands together. Too tired to pull away or argue, I just sat there and watched him.

"And it's something I must live with everyday, for the rest of my life, knowing that my selfish and wrong doings had caused you great pain." He lifted our joined hands and placed a warm kiss on my hand. "I am so sorry-"

"Your Grace?" A voice that sounded young and firm but relief to my ears, interrupted Rhaegar from his apology. With his eyes still on mine, Rhaegar replied in a hard and angry tone, "What is it?".

"Your mother, her majesty: Queen Rhaella, would like to see you immediately, your Grace". At the mention of his mother's name, we both looked up to see that it was Ser Jamie who came to retrieve him. I looked back at Rhaegar to see him contemplating whether to go or not.

I , however, took the chance to dismiss him. "Go and see your mother Rhaegar. I know she misses you too." I gently urged, wanting anything but for him to continue his heart-felt sorry.

Hurt visible in his expression, Rhaegar nodded and straightened up to his full height and turned to walk towards the entrance of the solar. I kept my eyes on his retreating form to see him stop in front of Ser Jaime. Without looking at the young man, Rhaegar asks in a soft voice, "Ser Jaime, would you please escort my wife back to her chambers. I fear the day seems to be taking a toll on her."

I narrowed my eyes at him and before I could retort a reply at my husband, Ser Jaime spoke up and bowed his head. "Of course, your grace."

With that, Rhaegar took his leave but not before sneaking a glance at me.

Relieved that he left, I was content with the silence that had fallen around me. Sighing, I slowly pulled myself up from the chair, with Ser Jaime helping. My arms wrapped around his as he slowly lead the way to my chambers. Through our walk there, we spoke in a comfortable chat about things that were shared amongst friends.

During the time Rhaegar was away, taking Ser Arthur and Ser Gerold with him, Ser Jaime was tasked with take post at my chambers as sentry. With no one other than Ashara and Rhaella to talk to, I would sometimes strike up conversations with him. We have something of a friendship now. It was easy conversing with him, as it always is with Rhaella and Ashara.

I was so drawn in to the conversation, giggling here and there to his japes; that I didn't realise we had reached the doors to my chambers.

"Here we are Princess, safely back at your quarters", Ser Jaime said as he beamed at me with that dashing smirk of his. He was so handsome, one would think that he wasn't eight and ten but older.

I couldn't help but smile back at him, his smile too infectious to resist. But before I could utter a word, Ser Jaime frowned, "Your grace, I pray that I'm not too forward but I could not help but notice that you seem to be under the weather, would you like for me to summon Maester Aemon?"

Surprised by his question and clear concern in his voice, I cleared my throat before answering him. "No, no, that won't be necessary, I'm quite alright. Besides, Maester Aemon is in conference with the King. It would be _rude_ to interrupt their little talk."

Understanding all to well, Ser Jaime nodded, "Then, may I suggest that you partake in some water before retiring? It would help to dispel whatever's ailing you. It works for me whenever I seem to find myself not feeling up to it or unwell".

Blushing, I nodded and smiled, "Thank you, Ser Jaime".

He returned the smile and opened the door for me. When I was safely in the confines of my rooms, Ser Jaime bowed his head and closed the door, leaving me alone with Ashara and the children.

Night came as soon as the sun left the sky and already the children were bathed, changed into their night clothes and put to sleep as soon as they finished their evening meal. Ashara and I remained awake, talking and giggling away about stories that we heard from the ladies at court.

Amidst the story-telling, Ashara was brushing my long dark hair as I sat in front of the mirror, a nightly ritual before going to bed. She seemed rather determined to make it soft and silky by the time she reaches the hundredth stroke. It felt wonderful with just her and me in the room, with the children asleep and no one to disturb us. It reminded me of the time I had with Ser Jamie earlier today.

But with Rhaegar it was different. Gone were the days it felt good to talk to him, to be with him. Now, I just can't stand being in the same room with him without getting angry or hurt.

"Elia?" came a soft voice beside me. I looked up to see a concerned look upon Ashara's face. "Are you ok?".

"Yes. I'm fine", I replied, giving her a reassuring smile. Not looking at all convinced, Ashara snorted in an unladylike manner, "Oh Elia, I've known you long enough to know that there is something on your mind".

With one long final brush stroke, Ashara set to plaiting my thick hair in a loose braid. "Come on-", she said as she weaved my long hair about, "tell your best friend what's bothering you".

My shoulders slumped as I released a deep breath and told her about the **_talk_** I had with Rhaegar. I told her about him confessing his feelings for the Stark girl and despite admitting that he loved the girl, his proclaiming his love for me.

As she finished plaiting my hair, Ashara looked disgusted.

"I swear, Elia, if he wasn't a Prince that was destined to overthrow his mad father of a King, I would have beaten the man into a bloody pulp, that he would end up looking like a bloody blood orange!" fumed Ashara as we made our way to the bed and laid on it, facing each other.

I chuckled at the angry expression her face had. She reminds me so much of Oberyn.

 _I miss my brothers._

 _I miss Dorne._

"Elia", murmured Ashara, her hand brushing aside a few stray hairs from my face, "I spoke to my brother."

"I trust he's in good health, yes?", I asked in a tired voice as I closed my eyes. She started caressing my face. "He is".

"That's good," I said, smiling, feeling a light feathery touch on my lips.

"Elia".

Too tired to sense the quiet seriousness in her tone, I hummed in reply, my eyes slightly opened to look at Ashara, her light amethyst eyes filled with what looked like sorrow...or was that pity? Why would her eyes have such emotion? _Unless..._

No more feeling drained nor tired but a little nervous at the look my friend was giving me, I frowned. "What is it?", I asked her as I took her hands in mines, squeezing them gently.

She looked at me sadly, her beautiful amethyst eyes glistening as tears filled them. "Oh Elia, _meri sundar behan (My dear sweet sister),_ you don't deserve such a fate that has been forced upon you".

Fate? _What fate?_ But before I could ask her what she meant by that, she blurted one word "Dorne" that made me still for a moment.

Dorne. _What about Dorne?_

Then I realised with sorrow in my heart that Ashara was asking if she could go back to Dorne.

After all that happened to Brandon returning to winterfell and her being pregnant with the wild wolf's child, there was nothing here in Kingslanding for Ashara but heartbreaks and more heartbreaks. At least in Dorne, her and the child will have a safe and comfortable life amongst close family and friends, an escape from more gossips that will surely follow her once she starts showing. It would be good for her and the baby.

 _But I will surely miss her._

Maybe... ** _no._**

I will let her go.

Let her have a life that will make her happy...oh Ashara, _Main_ _sab_ _mere_ _dil_ ke _saath_ _tumhen_ _yaad_ _hoga (I will miss you with all my heart)._

"Arthur told me that he and the crown prince was in Dorne", Ashara spat disdainfully as she continued speaking before I could utter a word to her. But instead all I could do was blink stupidly at her, trying to grasp the meaning behind her words.

Then it dawned on to me.

" ** _What??!_** ", I hissed, my eyes widening in shock as I lifted my head. ** _My husband_** and my most trusted friend from young was in Dorne. **Dorne!**

" _Haan (Yes)_ , Elia. The Prince was secretly residing at the Tower of Joy with his she-wolf."

 _That-that... **that Bastard!!**_

I was utterly furious by this new piece of information, and very much hurt that I was only hearing it now after the 'deed' was done on the golden sands of my homeland. Just by thinking about it made me even more angrier. _How could he?_ _How could he do this to me?_ _Betray me like this?_

As these thoughts wildly swirled around my head like the sand storms in Dorne, a hard knock came from my chamber door.

Knowing that I was in no mood to receive visitors much less anyone at this point, Ashara, my ever wonderful and most trusted friend, tucked a loose strand of my hair behind my ear and with a smile that said that she understands, got up to open the door.

I didn't see who it was when she opened it nor did I care. I was still trying to understand why the God's are so cruel to have decided to punish me so in such a way.

 _Have I not been faithful to them?_

 _Obeyed all their sacred commandments?_

Mayhap... _mayhap_ _it's_ _because_ _I_ _selfishly_ _wanted a love_ _that was never meant to burn for me?_ Whatever their reasons are, I surely did not deserve it.

"Elia", a voice that sounded - to my annoyance - very familiar, called behind me.

 _Sighs_.

And now the Gods see fit to ruin my evening as well.

I turned around from my position on the bed to see Rhaegar. I searched the room for my friend but Ashara was no where in sight. He must have excused her. My eyes then rested on Rhaegar. He looked every bit as a Prince that he was with his black tunic trimmed in gold, and his hair; so silver like the moon, clinging to his neck - a sign that he just bathed and it looked like he didn't bother drying his hair as he pulled on his clothes and hurriedly made his way to see me.

Seeing him there, standing in front of me, erupted so many emotions within me that it entranced me to do something.

To scream at him till I was blue in the face.

To slap and punch till bruises bloomed immediately on his pale flesh.

To scratch and bite till he bleeds in pain.

Anything to show my hurt and pain at what he did to me.

 _To our children._

My heart clenched at the thought of them and my unborn child. _Would they hate me if they knew I felt such hatred towards_ _their father?_

 _That I want the love that I have for him to fade away as soon as possible?_

Aegon and the unborn babe will definitely be sheltered from such thoughts as they are too young to understand it but Rhaenys; my dear beautiful Rhaenys. She was quickly growing. Physically and mentally. It would be pointless in hiding anything from her.

The thought of it brought tears to my eyes.

Everything is falling apart and it is all due to the man who was moving towards me in slow but determined steps. He stopped midway though as he saw the tears roll down my cheeks. _Great_. Now I'm crying. This pregnancy is turning me in to such a mess.

"Elia", my husband Rhaegar said as he came towards me in a full stride, his strong arms gathering me up in an embrace that felt wonderfully warm but wrong at the same time. "My darling Elia". I sobbed even harder at the pathetic position I was in. _Why am I crying?_ I shouldn't be crying. Especially not in **_his_** arms.

I wonder; did he hold the Stark girl the same way he was holding me? **No.** _Theirs was more with passion and love than the one we have now._

 **This.**

 _This is pity._ Pity for his plain and fragile wife who is - like his she wolf - _pregnant_.

That made me see red. I glared at the man that was holding me. **_How dare he?_** How dare he, this pale creature of a man, hold me like he really cares for me.

"Let go of me!", I scoffed in anguish and pulled my body out of his embrace of lies and deception and with some strength, pushed him away from me—though it only made him stumble backwards to which he quickly regained his footing through his great reflexes. Though the look in his eyes made my inner self smirk in triumph at the hurt expression he has on his face.

"Elia, please", he implored, his hands reaching out for me. "Will you not forgive me?".

I stared at him as if he had gone mad like his father. "Forgive you?!", I asked half screaming; forgetting for a moment that the children were asleep. "Forgive you? Rhaegar, how could I ever??".

"I know yo—".

"You know **_nothing_** Rhaegar", I said—still angry. " Of the pain you have caused me. The love I-I-I...", I inhaled deeply to regain my composure and continued albeit shakily, "—I had to keep safe from you killing it".

He shook his head as he took a step towards me, "Elia, I would never in a million years destroy the love we have for each other, the love I have for you".

"Yes I know", I softly smiled and gazed out to the window.

The wind blowing in time with the sounds of the waves upon the shore; the watery blankets reflecting the moon's glowing sadness upon it's face as if it pained for the heartbroken princess.

 _For me._ "Though it hadn't stopped you from hurting me now did you?".

I continued to gaze at the tragically beautiful scenery as he chose to remain silence. _Coward,_ I inwardly cursed as I turned my gaze to him. He looked so...conflicted.

I cleared my throat, "I know".

He looked at me in confusion. "Know what?".

I glared at him in annoyance, "I **know** about Dorne". I watched his expression turn from confusion to guilt which made a piece of my heart...die. _Soon there will be none left_.

He opened his mouth to say something but he couldn't. He was speechless. As if the words failed to come to his aid. That made me all the more upset.

"Dorne, Rhaegar?." I asked, hurt evident in my voice. "Why would you betray me like this?".

"I—It was the only place I could think of at the time. The only place I knew no one would care to look for us there", he replied, his shoulders hung in defeat.

I wiped at the tears that fell freely down my cheeks. "So, not only are you **_unfaithful_** to me but you **_hurt_** me in the most horrible way as well." I laughed, "I do not know which is worse; you being unfaithful to the love we had I thought was real or you sleeping with the girl on the very sands I grew up on?".

 _Truly the Gods are cruel._

He flinched at my harsh words. "I...Elia, I-" .

"Did you know I laid in tears in bed all night after you disappeared. Everyday. Till now", I looked at him tearfully, "On some nights, I wondered if you were safe and well. Or if you were dead", I swallowed down the sob that threatened to escape, "On other nights, when I was feeling at my worst, I would think that you found someone else to love. Someone that was not sickly or frail", I stared at him, his dark orbs meeting my yellow ones. "Someone that could give you what you've always wanted".

"Elia, don't. Please", he begged as he took a huge step towards me, sat beside me on the bed and embraced me once more - not caring whether I wanted it or not. "No more my love, I beg you".

"Why? You know I speak the truth", I whispered as my eyes closed, my head underneath his chin.

"I know my darling", he solemnly replied, "But you forget", he said and kissed my hair and my closed eyelids, "I still love you".

I opened my eyes and gently removed my head out from under his chin and looked at him, "You love me...just not _in_ love with me", I stated sadly.

"Darling, **_I love you_** ", he fiercely proclaimed and hugged me tightly, "Always have, always will".

Tears dripped down my chin. I gazed into his eyes, his indigo orbs meeting my yellow ones . "If you love me, then why'd you leave me?".

He seemed at a loss of words and couldn't answer the question that had been in my head for many moons now. Seeing my opportunity, I gently pushed him away hoping he would let go but he tightened his grip, "Elia, I—".

"Shhhhh", I whispered soothingly and placed a finger on his lips, "Enough, Rhaegar. I am tired. Leave me to rest", I implored, "Please".

He looked conflicted. He didn't want to leave me but seeing the look in my eyes, he conceded. He gripped my finger that was on his lips and intensely stared at me as he kissed it with his warm lips.

The old me would have blushed like a maiden but not now. Not after everything that has passed.

No, instead I smiled. And bowed my head to him. I felt his gaze linger on my head for moment till he released his hold on my finger and got up. I raised my head up and gently lowered myself down to lie down as the sound of the door closed and his footsteps fade away into nothing.

I closed my eyes.

 _I am Unbent, Unbowed but. . . . .I am very much broken._

And I cried into my pillow, it's softness and thickness swallowing up my tears and cries.

 ** _I'm Broken._**

 ** _So Broken._**

 ** _Broken._**

0000

So...I hope you all are appeased with my peace offering?

Thanks to all those who reviewed before and if you are still with me, thanks again. Reviews are greatly appreciated. The next update will probably come soon. No promises though. But I will try my very best if there is a demand but otherwise, I will take my time as I have other stories to focus on.

Moce (BYE! .)

Closest Translations:

Meri sundar behan - My Dear Sweet Sister.

Main sab mere dil ke saath tumhen yaad hoga - I will miss you with all my heart.

 **P.S.** I really hate what's happening in GoT right now. So I've sworn off of watching it anymore. Saves me from feeling any pain or emotion when it shows the unjust of it all. (I literally cried T_T)

#Rhaegar was a real jerk. Plain and Simple.

Thanks again for reading.


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